Bagpipes Jokes

What is the difference between bagpipes players and terrorists?

Terrorists have sympathizers.

How long does it take to tune the bagpipes?

Nobody knows.

Why do bagpipe players walk while they play?

To get away from the noise.

What’s the difference between the Highland bagpipes and the Edinburgh bagpipes?

The Highland bagpipes burn hotter; the Edinburgh burn longer.


What is the ideal weight for a bagpipes player?

About 2 1/2 lbs. including the urn.

Jock McTavish, the famous bagpipes player, was once handed an autograph book by a fan while backstage after a concert. “There’s not much room on this page,” he said. “What shall I write?”

Another player standing by offered the following helpful hint: “Write your repertoire.”


Why do so many people take an instant dislike to the bagpipes ?

It saves time.

How can you tell when a bagpipes player is playing out of tune?

He’s blowing in them.

More Bagpipes Jokes